Self Monster

It’s hard to describe what I’m feeling inside.
I’m conscious and breathing, but barely alive.
Lying in my bed, I’m pondering, I’m gazing, I’m staring.
I’m looking towards something, but really, it’s nothing.

Been trying to shake this feeling for quite sometime,
But the harder I have tried, the bigger it’s snide!
So I pause, then stop, then wait for the changing tides.
Hoping it brings meaning and my long lost self-pride.

And so I mope, and groan, and rant, and whine.
I allowed this monster and me to intertwine
Gazed it’s reflection on the mirror to my side
My mouth dropped in shock as its face was same as mine

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